Sunday, October 21, 2012

Special Needs

Special Needs

Some people say that I have a Special Needs Child
I have a low tolerance for that
Some say she is a child with Special Needs
that seems somewhat kinder and
more accurate.

It's true.
She has Special Needs.
She needs
A Chance.
Those things everyone needs.

Maybe we all have Special Needs.


So someone, somewhere was talking about "Special Needs Children" and it pissed me directly off. Although I can't even tell you the circumstances now. It could have been on tv or something I did make me think. I suspect some people are trying to be nice and some accurate, but it seems saccharine to me now. My sweetie-pie does have some challenges, but we all do, so how do I discuss it without getting pissed or getting my feelings hurt? I don't know.

Friday, October 12, 2012

The Day of the Girl

The Day of the Girl

recognize girls’ rights and the unique challenges girls face around the world.
its first observance
     child marriage
           a fundamental human rights violation
and impacts all aspects of a girl’s life
     denies a girl of her childhood  
     disrupts her education
     limits her opportunities
     increases her risk to be a victim of violence and abuse
     jeopardizes her health
    and therefore
          constitutes an obstacle to the development of healthy communities.

     around one in three young women aged 20-24 years were first married before they reached age 18. One third of them entered into marriage before they turned 15.

Prevent child marriage
protect girls’ rights
help reduce their risks of violence
                                    early pregnancy
                                    HIV infection
                                    and maternal death and disability


his is totally a found poem. I got it from the UN website I always feel a little guilty for found poetry.  However, I have had writer's block since a mean literary aggent person told me to go to school (pouty face). How's this for insight you ugly-shoe-wearing mean person! Yeah, I showed her. Thanks found poem!

Monday, October 8, 2012

I Suck at Friendship

I Suck at Friendship

There are some things that I want to blame on my depression:

that I don't have my PhD
that I want to sleep 14 out of 24 hours
     (although that may be the vitamin deficiency)
that I don't want to leave my house
that I am unemployed
that I feel so alone...

but mostly that I am a terrible friend.
I don't make the effort
and I let people treat me as disposable
then I disappear when they need me.

But maybe,

maybe the depression is just an excuse to be lazy
and selfish
and alone
and, why I suck...

No, that's not me...that's just the depression talking.


So this poem was just now written after some inner reflection inspired by a post by Shybiker, who has a wonderful blog. She wrote about rejection in tonight's post and it resonated with  me. I have a strong desire to be here more often, to write more often.  And still I don't. My poor neglected lasagna. I'm gonna blame it on my depression.

Thursday, June 7, 2012

dVerse prompt: Where in the World


The sky in Grove Hill is just
It makes me feel
ready to fight.

The colors in the sunset are not
The snot string clouds are not

I spend my weekends with you and then I
I travel 200 miles where my life is not?
Half-way home I drive through
Grove Hill.
Where the sky is

June 7, 2012

Tonight's poem is my submission for dVerse Meeting in the Bar: "Where in the World?" I have been in an unusually non-science fiction mood lately. So unlike me...hopefully I can snap out of it before I have to surrender my Star Wars, Star Trek, and Dr. Who fan club memberships. Although, seriously, what's the deal with the Sky in Clarke County?

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

FWF Submission: Up the Creek

Up the Creek

She was in kindergarten in an all girl school. This was the seventies, and Katie loved everything about school except for getting up in the morning. Lately, the fun thing was to lean over and look under the partition into the next stall while you were in the restroom. That way, you didn't have to stop your conversation with your friend just because you had to go. It was also a fun and interesting way to meet new friends when both kindergarten classes were in the bathroom at the same time. There was an etiquette for initiating a conversation. You were supposed to stick your hand under the shared wall of the stall and ask "who's that?" The other girl would answer and you would look and say hey and life was good. If there was no answer, then you should look immediately, because this was still basically a public restroom and those could be tricky. Your friend could be in trouble and was depending on you to save her!

That day was like any other day. There was a break, she went to the bathroom with the rest of the class. She waited towards the end of the line. (She liked the ends, they were more special.) She entered her stall. She got to business. She looked down and saw shoes next to her. These were different shoes. She began protocol. Pointing, she asked "Who's that?", but there was no answer. She asked again, and again, no answer. Clearly, someone was in trouble. Katie was a very helpful girl and knew what she had to do. She looked under the stall "Who's in here?"

It was a woman. A woman she did not know. A woman with blond hair in a tight flip and a shocked expression. Katie sat back. She wanted to giggle and she wanted to throw up. She was very still and waited until she was sure that it was time for her mom to come get her. She was going to get in trouble with her teacher if she didn't leave the bathroom. She walked out and to the sinks. There was the woman.

"You! It was you!"

Katie ran. She ran and ran and ran and ran and ran. She ran all the way to her classroom and sat down quietly in her seat.

Someone came to the classroom and took her teacher out. When Mrs. May came back, she was not happy.

"Miss Wills has said that someone peeped on her while she was in the bathroom. Who did it?"

Peeped! Katie didn't peep! She looked, it was different. If Miss Wills was in trouble, Katie would have been a hero. What should she do? Katie decided. She was going to keep quiet. If she was discovered, then she would probably cry and that would be bad, so keeping quiet was a good idea.

The classroom clocked ticked. Mrs May said "we are going to wait until someone confesses and apologizes to Miss Wills."

There was no way Katie was apologizing; Miss Wills had ugly hair. The clock kept ticking. Katie thought that she may cry soon and be discovered.

Evie raised her hand. "Sarah and I looked under the wall." "Thank you Evie. Will you and Sarah come with me?"

Katie watched them go. Miss Wills would know that it wasn't Evie and Sarah. She did have ugly hair, but she had good eyes.

Mrs. May brought Evie and Sarah back.  "Evie and Sarah have apologized. They are very brave. I expect that no one will look under the stall doors and walls again."

Katie had no idea what had happened. She was free. All she had to do was avoid Miss Wills.

In second grade, Katie met her new teacher, Miss Wills.

June 4, 2012

This is my first blog post in response to Kellie Elmore's Free Write Friday (FWF). For those of you who are unfamiliar with Free Write Friday, you can get more information here I have tweeted some micropoems in response to a FWF prompt. This is the prompt for this story:

O.k., I know you have all heard that old saying, “…up shit creek without a paddle”, right? (Or maybe it’s just a southern thing, I don’t know.) Well, if you haven’t let me just break it down for ya. We have all been in a mess, a pickle, in a …tight spot, right? When times were hard and you couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, hence…up shit creek without a paddle. Often times we are able to look back on those situations and find humor, a lesson learned or just realize that it really wasn’t as bad as we thought…or maybe it was but you survived. Some great stories can almost always be found from these…ripples in life and for FWF, I’d like you to share them. Be poetic, be humorous, be inspirational…just don’t forget to be real, raw and most importantly, just write! You know what to do.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012



Never satisfied.
Never good enough.
Strive for excellence-perfection,
there is always room for improvement.
You must always be better.
You can always do better.
The best is the only thing that is


originally written 8/2000

I originally wrote this as part of an developmental profile of myself for a school project. It made me uncomfortable then and it makes me uncomfortable now. (maybe even more uncomfortable now) I am posting this today and linking it to dverse Open Link Night. I think if this poem teaches me nothing else, it does let me know that I should never volunteer to coach any of my kids' team sports. Thanks for visiting!

Monday, June 4, 2012

dverse prompt: work

My Work

I guess my workday begins
at 6:00am.
A hard little body plops on me
with a
"Get up Mommy" or
"Hi sweetie" or
"Mommy, get up, I'm hungry"

Another warm, smaller, body has climbed
in beside me
sometime in the night.

"Okay baby, don't wake your brother."
or, if I'm honest,
"Please, sweetie, let Mommy sleep a few minutes more,
and please don't wake your brother."

Get up, feed them, clothe them, watch them, love them
keep them safe.
Watch them create chaos where I am trying to create order.
Wonder what have I gotten myself into.
Laugh at their silliness.
Worry about them, soothe their wounds, love them.
Lose my temper, yell, cry, worry that I have scarred them for life.
Love them.
Bathe them, put them to bed. Try to create some order, fall further behind.
Wonder what in the hell I have gotten myself into.
Feel inept.
Feel scared.
Love them.
Try to sleep, always trying to listen for them.

My workday started almost six years ago, and will never end.
My work is to love them.

June 4, 2012

This is my first try at a dversepoets prompt. ( I have been tweeting micropoems on Twitter in my absence from here (follow me @bigrthanlasagna) and discovered them there. However,  I missed the deadline, of course, so I can't submit it to dverse. In a pure nod to Pollyanna, I am glad for the idea. Hope you like it and I hope that this helps get me back here. I miss my big lasagna!

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

One Day On the Bus: Another Look at India

Another Look at India

     You know that this whole experiment was a mistake. It's absolutley bewildering how he thought that you could make it in the real world. You didn't even have to volunteer to come home. He told you to. He commanded, and you return like the good little appliance you are. Shit, you don't even get dog rating, do you? You're like one of those little remote control cars, and now you're going back. You know he's going to shut you down.Why are you doing this? You do have a brain. You know you's metallic. What's the use? You have to go home because you don't like it out here. You miss him. You miss the lab. You don't fit in here. Go home. At least you'll have some happiness before he shuts you down.


Friday, March 9, 2012

One Day On a Bus: Charlie, the Bus Driver

Charlie, The Bus Driver

     Jesus! Did that bitch go over the freakin' deep end or what? No woman does that to Charlie Hicks and gets away with it! He'll teach her like he used to teach Em before she got in with those lesbo-libbers and ran off. Although Em didn't know how to sock ya' one like this broad. Charlie though that he could come to respect a woman like that India Bellegraves. She even had a strong sounding name. India. Yeah, he could get to like that. It all took him by surprise, though. He would always trip one every now and then. Maybe he had been tripping them a little more since Em had made like a tree. But still, that was no excuse to haul off and hit him like that. How did she even know that he'd done it? Probably because the little lady had a brain or two in her head. Maybe it was time for Charlie to expand his horizons. God knows that Em was always spoutin' off that kind of manure at him. Maybe he's just like this little librarian out. He would still have to punish her first, but maybe afterwards, they could go for a beer or something. Yeah, he'd do just that. Just as soon as he got out of the hospital.


My most favorite of this series. I want to try to write him again. He's  awful.